Hi Everyone! its time to move on to bigger and better things.

So its been almost a month since I've posted.  Last post was about my crazy neighbor and my husbands health.  Well that's an understatement.

I've been threw quite a few changes over the last month.

#1.  My husband decided to walk out on my tell me it was for a break and it turned out to be permanent.

#2.  Lost my job over my panic attacks

#3.  Husband told me July 4th to make alternative arrangements for myself.  That was his wonderful way of telling me he wanted it over.

#4.  I had to move back into my parents.

#5. Husband wasn't talking to me as to what he wanted regaurding us and our marriage so I took control and decided to file on my own for a divorice.

#6. In the process of it all I have learned that my decision is for the best.  I have learned that the whole 1 1/2 years i was married to him was a total lie.  He's gone behind my back on quite a few things that i cant mention here. 

#7. 3 weeks after he walks out and abandoned me i find that he is dating his best friends WIFE.  Yep he stole his best friends girl.  and that is one of the main reasons he left.  I know it doesn't happen overnight like he claims.

#8. I found out most of our marriage he has been cheating on me and lieing to me about lots of things.

I've dealt with it pretty good considering things.  the doc changed my anxiety meds and the panic attacks have stopped for now.  I feel he was the main cause of them to begin with now. 
The funny thing is the first week he was gone it was one day he wanted it over and then the next day its we can work it out.  and i got sick of the back and fourth.  The even stranger part is that 2 days prior to me finding out he was in love with his best friends wife he was trying to make things work with me and telling me that the marriage fell apart because of him.  And that we should do counseling more for me than anything cuz i need it more, and that he's been faithful to me the entire time. 

Now with all that i know I have a very hard time believing the being faithful part cuz you don't just fall in love with someone in 2 days.  when her husband has told me that they made out weeks ago.  and when i looked on the calender it turned out to be right around the time he had walked out on me.  So I am trusting my gut instinct and making decisions to control my life, and he will NO MORE CONTROL ME.

No more covering with my family for the crappy things he's done to me, or the way he treated me.  No more listening to him complain about my family and just being overall treated like i am last on his list of priories. 

Time to move on.